Manhattan, Kansas - In an unprecedented move, the
International Association of Jazz Advocacy (IAJA) announced Wednesday that it has
banned the use of 13 of the most offensively trite words in jazz journalism. These are:
1. soaring
2. screaming
3. wailing
4. scorching
5. burning
6. incendiary
7. sinuous
8. muscular
9. angular
10. jagged
11. ragged
12. funky
13. gritty
Chevy Prefect, president of the newly formed IAJA, a
non-profit corporation whose membership is rumored to be comprised of a reorganized group of former
members of the IAJE (International Association of Jazz Education--which filed for bankruptcy and finally dissolved in 2009) issued this statement:
"These words constitute the most egregiously abused
clichés in music writing. Of particular
interest to the IAJA, of course, is their overuse in jazz writing. Journalists, in their never-ending search for
the perfectly purple adjective, invariably choose the same 13 words that have
been beaten to death for the last twenty years and rendered utterly
meaningless. If you want to know why more people don't listen to jazz, just
look at the way the music is repeatedly described in print. In the interests of both forwarding the music that
is this country's greatest indigenous art form, and preserving the English
language, writers are encouraged to immediately cease all use of these turgid,
lifeless terms, and urged, if it isn't too late, to buy a dictionary or
thesaurus."
Prefect went on to say that the IAJA's research had
discovered material for further exploration of jazz journalism's language abuses
in several other areas. "In the pocket,"
he noted, though currently not particularly in vogue, and not always employed
as an adjective even when it is, is possibly the most confusing phrase in jazz
journalism. He also stated that the list of fire-related adjectives is
not limited to the ones cited above as 4., 5. and 6., since such words seemingly go on forever. Newly in fashion,
he said, but already on the IAJA's Endangered Specious List, is "tattoo," which
in current parlance can take the place of "ostinato" or any number of
other musical terms.
Prefect concluded by saying that the IAJA's research
committee has indicated an interest in immediately investigating one of the
most unusual findings in its language survey. In a sampling of 100 working jazz musicians with active or recently active recording contracts, 78 of them favored an indefinite ban on any
use of the word "jazz."
When contacted and asked for comment on the IAJA's announced
list of banned adjectives, Nate Chinen of the New
York Times, Will Friedwald of the Wall Street
Journal, Bill Milkowski of Jazz Times,
Don Heckman of the Los Angeles Times and Paul
de Barros of the Seattle Times, did
not return our calls, although Nat Hentoff is rumored to have said to the
manager of an East Village newsstand late yesterday afternoon, "What, they need to ask?" A Manhattan (NYC) cabbie also emailed me late last night to say he'd picked up the Wall Street Journal critic as a fare outside Dizzy's--and that when he asked what the writer thought about the ban, Friedwald had struck an Austin Powers-like pose and laughed quietly to himself.
6 comments:
Hilarious, Carl! I must confess to using muscular, angular and occasionally, soaring.
Yes, so have I, Robert... But I recently joined a local chapter of Adjectives Anonymous.
Are you sure this isn't from The Onion (Jazz Edition)?
Love it. On a related topic, the general use of "amazing" has not abated one bit since it was given the top spot of words that should be permanently banned this year. I just joined the "Overuse of the Word 'Amazing'" Facebook page. We do what we can.
I'd like to nominate "infectious" (after I wash my hands)
Dave - The Onion would hire me to produce a special edition such as what you describe, but they can't afford me.
Lorraine - I'm with you. I just joined the "Overuse of the Word 'Amazing'" Facebook page. A friend suggested that the IAJA ban the obnoxiously overused word "sensibilities" and my good friend Anonymous here suggests removing "infectious." I concur in both cases. There is good news in that regard, as I am anticipating an announcement from the IAJA that they will soon extend the list of banned words, and are accepting suggestions for which words to ban from astute observers such as yourself.
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